Thursday, September 13, 2012


I thought that I would put my thoughts and words down here today.  I am scared and worried and I don't know if I have to be. That is the worst part do I need to be worried. Let me go back.
I had my annual exam at my OBGYN, and she found a lump in my breast during the exam. I will be honest, I am scared of what this could be. I go on Monday for the mamogram and a ultrasound to find out what this lump is. I keep on telling myself there is no point in being worried until I know there is something to worry about. However, I can't help but be worried.
I am scared, I will be honest here. This is a scaring thing. I am scared of the unknown. I am 30 years old and I have never had a mamogram, I don't know what to expect. I am scared this could be cancer. If it is cancer what happens then? I am the only one working, will I be able to keep working or will I have to take Medical leave? How will we be able to afford the treatments? How will Pickle do with a sick Mommy all the time? Will I die?

There are so many questions that I have, and I don't have any answers.
How do I go on waiting until Monday for the test? I don't know how.

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