How do you feel about god? I don't know how to answer that question. It has been on my mind a lot lately.
For the last few months I have had a very negative outlook on things. We are broke and struggling every day to make ends meet, and it seems like that is the only fact I can focus on. This needs to change. When I decided that I needed a new outlook on life, I started thinking about God lately. I was brought up semi religious environment. My Grandmother is a devote catholic, and brought her kids up in the church. My mother was baptized as a protestant and not brought up in church. Because of these 2 different upbringing by my own parents, Religion was not pushed upon us, which I am forever grateful for. This has lead me to be what I call a bad catholic/Christian.
I believe in God and Jesus Christ, However I don't know if I put my whole heart into it like so many do. I find it hard to put my faith and trust in someone or something, when things are going as badly as they are currently. I know that many of you reading would tell me, now is the time to find my faith and put all my trust into the church and Christ, but I just can't do it. I feel like I am waiting on a sign from someone or something telling me this is how I need to lead my life, but will I recognize the sign when it comes my way.
Everyday is a new question for me, but for now the one thing I know is that I need to change my thoughts, and put my trust in my family and start finding the light in every day. I have a great life, yes it is hard, yes we struggle, but we love one another, and our beautiful son. We have family who loves and supports us and for that I will always be forever grateful.